All in All Just Another Brick in the Wall

Suffocation, my lungs seize up, and I forget to breathe everytime I see you. My heart skips a beat at the mention of your name. I stand before a wall I cannot scale and know you wait on the other side.  I built this wall, it is here because of my own two hands. All I desire to do is break through the brick and mortar, the lies and distrust I built between us and be reunited with you again. I’m not strong enough yet. My arms flail helplessly trying to reach you.

I’ve been distressed, flurries of advice encircle me, “Move on” “you can do better” “You don’t deserve her” The last one stings worst because it is true. I don’t deserve you, your kind heart, your loving ways, your beauty that I wish I could hold all my days. I’m in love. I’m a fool. I’m in despair, wanting to end it all because I can’t have you now and the guilt of my past. 

If I die, I have given up hope. That is not something I’m giving up yet, I’d rather die than give up hope. So for now, I need to start, small steps, as I dismantle the wall, brick by brick, and maybe one day, I’ll reach you on the other side. Until then, I can only pray that my love still holds those feelings true

I’ll be waiting outside your walls, for the gates to come down around me.

Rebirth now, I want to live for love, I wanna live for you and breathe for the first time now

Never, ever give up hope

Love, Icarus

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